I write and speak about blended families quite often. Once I was on a panel discussing stepfamily ministry, and a woman later asked me if I could give her a list of scriptures to use in her church for stepfamily ministry. I gave her a few off the top of my head, but I decided to sit down and put a few on paper.

If you are a blended family, know a blended family, or minister to blended families, you will find this list helpful. And if you know of anymore that we could add, please leave a comment and let me know!

Stepfamilies in the Bible:

  • Jesus had a stepfather – Joseph (Matthew 1, Luke 2)
  • Woman at the well (John 4:4-26)
  • Ruth, Naomi, and Boaz (Book of Ruth)
  • Abraham, Sarah, and Hagar (Genesis 21)
  • Joseph and his half-brothers (Genesis 37-39)
  • King David and the children of his multiple wives (2 Kings, Chronicles 3)

Brokenness can be beautiful:

  • Psalm 34:18 “The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit.”
  • Psalm 147:3 “He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.”
  • Isaiah 57:15 “For thus says the One who is high and lifted up, who inhabits eternity, whose name is Holy: ‘I dwell in the high and holy place, and also with him who is of a contrite and lowly spirit, to revive the spirit of the lowly, and to revive the heart of the contrite.’”
  • Matthew 5:3-4 “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.”
  • Psalm 51:8 “Let me hear joy and gladness; let the bones that you have broken rejoice.”
  • 2 Corinthians 12:9-10 “But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.”
  • 2 Corinthians 1:3-4 “Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.”
  • James 1:2-4 “Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.”

Be patient and let God heal:

  • Philippians 1:6 “And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.”
  • Joel 2:25 “I will restore to you the years that the swarming locust has eaten …”
  • Exodus 15:26 “… I am the Lord, your healer.”
  • Hebrews 4:15-16 “For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.”
  • Matthew 11:28-30 “Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.”
  • Psalm 34:19 “Many are the afflictions of the righteous, but the Lord delivers him out of them all.”
  • Isaiah 43:19 “Behold, I am doing a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it? I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert.”
  • John 16:33 “I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.”
  • Psalm 119:50 “This is my comfort in my affliction, that your promise gives me life.”
  • Isaiah 40:31 “But they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.”

Divorce and remarriage is NOT the unforgiveable sin:

  • Matthew 12:31-32 “… I tell you, every sin and blasphemy will be forgiven people, but the blasphemy against the Spirit will not be forgiven.” (The only “unforgivable” sin.)
  • James 5:16 “Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working.”
  • 1 John 1:9 “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.”
  • Romans 3:10 “As it is written: ‘None is righteous, no, not one…’”

It is good to mourn your losses from the previous marriage:

  • Matthew 5:4 “Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.”
  • Isaiah 61:2-3 “…The Lord has anointed me… to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor, and the day of vengeance of our God; to comfort all who mourn; to grant to those who mourn in Zion—to give them a beautiful headdress instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, the garment of praise instead of a faint spirit; that they may be called oaks of righteousness, the planting of the Lord, that he may be glorified.”
  • John 11:35 “Jesus wept.”
  • Psalm 30:5 “For his anger is but for a moment, and is favor is for a lifetime. Weeping may tarry for the night, but joy comes with the morning.”
  • Ecclesiastes 7:4 “The heart of the wise is in the house of mourning, but the heart of fools is in the house of mirth.”
  • 2 Corinthians 7:10 “For godly grief produces a repentance that leads to salvation without regret, whereas worldly grief produces death.”
  • James 4:9-10 “Be wretched and mourn and weep. Let your laughter be turned to mourning and your joy to gloom. Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will exalt you.”
  • Lamentations 3:31-33 “For the Lord will not cast off forever, but, though he cause grief, he will have compassion according to the abundance of his steadfast love; for he does not afflict from his heart or grieve the children of men.”
  • Isaiah 53:3-4 “[Jesus] was despised and rejected by men; a man of sorrows and acquainted with grief; and as one from whom men hide their faces he was despised, and we esteemed him not. Surely he has borne our griefs and carried our sorrows.”
  • Psalm 56:8 “[God has] kept count of my tossings; put my tears in [his] bottle. Are they not in [his] book?”

Stepfamily dynamics:

Stepparenting:

  • Ephesians 6:4 “Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.”
  • Colossians 3:19-21 “Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them. Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord. Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.”
  • Proverbs 22:6 “Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.”

Control your temper:

  • Matthew 5:22 “But I say to you that everyone who is angry with his brother will be liable to judgment; whoever insults his brother will be liable to the council; and whoever says, ‘You fool!’ will be liable to the hell of fire.”
  • Proverbs 26:4 “Answer not a fool according to his folly, lest you be like him yourself.”
  • James 1:19 “Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God.”
  • Matthew 12:36-37 “I tell you, on the day of judgement people will give account for every careless word they speak, for by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned.”

Practice grace, kindness, and humility:

  • Colossians 3:12-14 “Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony.”
  • Galatians 6:2 “Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.”

Focus on God’s future plans for your family, not the past:

  • Philippians 3:13-14 “But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.”
  • Ephesians 3:14-15 “For this reason I bow my knees before the Father, from whom every family in heaven and on earth is named.” (emphasis added)
  • 1 Chronicles 16:11 “Seek the Lord and his strength; seek his presence continually!”
  • James 1:5 “If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him.”
  • Philippians 4:8 “Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.”